© 2011 expatmonkey. All rights reserved.

Horace: God of Haggling

He’s a close, but fair, trader.

As you may recall from middle-school Egyptology, before a pharaoh could go on to the afterlife, he first had to barter with Horace for a crowbar so he could get out of his sarcophagus (or, often, sarcophagi. MS Word is also accepting sarcophaguses, which I think I prefer. It sounds like Snuffaluffagus.).

In the photo above, taken at the Temple of Hatshepsut—between the Valleys of Kings and Queens, in the Valley of the Transvestites—Hatshepsut is appealing to Horace’s gambling addiction by suggesting a game of chance involving two seemingly innocent orbs of honey wine, one infused with iocaine powder. If Hatshepsut wins, the crowbar goes to the victor. If Horace wins, he will receive Hatshepsut’s head, so he can stop looking so silly with that bird head.

It is said that in the end, they both won. Everybody wins in ancient Egypt, that’s why it’s so cool.

* * * *

Tut-Uncommon (Zzzing!)

King Tut was actually the highlight of today, but cameras are (technically) not allowed anywhere in the Valley of the Kings, and yet, in addition to the main entrance, there are places to check them outside each tomb (and when we were alone in the tombs, local caretakers encouraged us to go ahead and take photos, in hopes of substantial baksheesh).

We were Tut’s first visitors of the day and so had his wee tomb to ourselves. It’s amazing how small it is, like Manhattan studio small (and no bathroom). There are plans to close the tomb soon for renovation (adding a second bedroom and master bath), but for now, in two adjacent rooms like (1) the innermost wooden coffin and sarcophagus of the boy king and (2) the boy king himself in a glass casket.

This is the first mummy I’ve seen in a long time, and it’s startling how it seems like if you know the subject personally, you could probably identify the body still (well, the face presumably). The raggedy shroud and brown inky leather skin are titillatingly creepy. I don’t know why Hollywood can’t make them remotely as dark as their actuality.

The Boy in the Bubble’s preservation is maintained by a device in and beside his Chris Angel quarters by a device that looks like it belongs in a nursing home, except for the digital humidifier.

Recent science supports the argument that yes, he did get so funky doing the monkey. Steve Martin nailed that one on the head.

man with colossi of memnon
Honey, get a photo of me with the colossi



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  5. –Here @ GoV, sensitive folk that we are, your comment will appear in brown on a beige background. What more could one ask for?And to think that some ppl claim we're "frightening"…I swan.

  6. Oi Diogo.Parabéns por mais uma análise esclarecedora, aliás todos os seus posts são muito interessantes e tem me ajudado muito.Seu endereço já está na minha barra de favoritos.Sucesso para você.

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